Book Review
Title: Madly, Deeply: The Diaries of Alan Rickman by Alan Rickman
Genre: Memoir, Diary
Rating: 5 Stars
When I heard that this book was coming out I knew I had to buy it immediately along with Tom Felton’s book which I will be picking up in a week or two. Alan Rickman was a huge part of my childhood portraying Severus Snape and one of my all time favourite actors so being able to read his uncensored thoughts was something I had to get my hands on. The main portion of the books contains his personal diary from the years 1993-2015 shortly before his death in January 2016 but there is also a section featuring his early diaries. The first 50 pages covers the entirety of 1993 and I knew Alan was funny, with a sarcastic, dry sense of humour put it really shines in these earlier years and the entry about filming sex scenes make me cackle with laughter. We also see a much softer side to Alan than he normal let show in the public eye especially where his wife, Rima is concerned and his close friends like Emma Thompson who wrote the forward for this book and actually talks about the last time she saw Alan before his death. While it is hard to put these entries into words and the effect they had on me since it was more emotional than most books I review I will do my best since I think many fans will relate to my thoughts on his diaries.
As we move through 1993 and 1994 we see that Alan lives a very hectic and stressful life that only took its toll on him bringing him down more than once with an illness it took him a while to recover from. He also dealt with a lot of stress and pressures from work, primarily facing two disputes with studios he was working with at the time. In addition to these two disputes, Alan struggled with decisions about taking on projects and frequently hating the movies he was working on as was the case with Mesmer and Rasputin. I loved the fact that Alan was a champion for actors new and old since he genuinely cared about them and how they were being treated at work and often stood up to directors for the sake of others because they wouldn’t speak up themselves. Alan also juggles various friendships, social engagements and his relationships with close family members like his mother and Rima which weigh a lot on his mind even though they support his choices. Alan also seems to have had a complicated relationship with the press since they are essentially to his line of work but he often clashed with them on a personally level. Despite being a huge fan, these were things that I had no idea about possibly because I hadn’t been born at the time but most likely because Alan was a very private person and sought to protect his privacy and the privacy of the people he cared for.
As we move through 1995-96, Alan doubts over his choice of movies to act in are beginning to lessen since several of the movies he disliked filming like Sense & Sensibility and Rasputin gain a lot of success. However, he is still struggling with health issues of his own including hearing loss that he suffered on the set of Rasputin and his mother’s slow decline in health which did result in her death in 1997 and I’m not quite sure I am ready to read Alan’s open and honest feelings after losing his only parent (his father died when he was a child) but I have a feeling that Rima will get him through it. As we move through the remainder of the 90s we see Alan becoming very detached from his work and finding little enjoyment in it because he doesn’t really have any passion for these projects which was heart-breaking to read since some of these movies were my favourites.
By the time we reach 2000 we enter my early childhood and the filming of Harry Potter which was a defining point for me growing up and solidified my love of Alan Rickman and everything he was in. This is also where the entries get shorter and we move through 2000-2004 pretty quickly.. While he does talk about the filming of Harry Potter there isn’t much detail apart from some hilarious comments about his co-workers. Alan also witnesses many people he has worked with died over these years and this impacts him quickly deeply as he does have strong attachments to certain people he has worked with. By the time we reach the filming of Prisoner of Azkaban it was interesting to learn that Alan didn’t really wanted to do any Harry Potter movies after the first two but wasn’t really listened to since he was so iconic in the role of Severus Snape even at this point. He comments about Rik Mayall were devastating since many might not even be aware that Drop Dead Fred was cast to play Peeves the Poltergeist but died before the film was finished and was removed from the movies since they didn’t want to cast anyone else in the role despite the large role Peeves plays later on in the series.
We move through the filming of the first Harry Potter movies and Alan’s feelings on them were upsetting to read as a lifelong fan of the series but considering his thoughts on other movies and plays he acted in as well as his attitude to his work in general, it makes sense. Throughout 2005, Alan’s life is touched by more tragedy as he loses more friends and a family member and finally gets an answer to his health problems but it is worse than anyone expecting. It turns out he was diagnosed in 2005 with an aggressive form of prostate cancer and had to undergo surgery in order to remove the entire prostate and knowing this it makes his death less surprising but more tragic. By the time the filming for Order of the Phoenix begins, Alan is disheartened that all anyone wishes to discuss with him are his older movies or Harry Potter and neither of these subjects are things he is passionate about and wishes that more people would take interest into the projects he poured his heart and soul into.
Throughout the filming process of Harry Potter which ended just before 2011, we see Alan’s life taking turns he never expected. He witnesses several friends die, tries to support Daniel Radcliffe through his drinking problem during Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince and reflects on how he has watched these children grow up during the filming process and is yet surprised when he realises they are adults now. Alan also begins to suffer from various health issues during this time including numerous sinus infections and given the fact this is only a few years before his death it doesn’t bode well. This is especially upsetting because Alan himself doesn’t even think that anything is wrong during this time and I am not sure my heart can handle what is going to come in the last 80 or so pages of this book.
The last years of these entries were heart-breaking as Alan seems to suspect his cancer has returned and gets numerous tests including those for prostate cancer but all come back clear. He does end up marrying his soulmate Rima but soon they get the news that Alan has pancreatic cancer. These is only six months between the diagnosis and Alan’s death even though they held out hope that chemotherapy would help and extend his life but it sadly didn’t. The entries in these last six months get shorter and shorter until they end on the 12th of December, Rima does explain at the end about Alan’s final month before his death on January 14th. Honestly, this was heart-breaking to read since Alan’s life was full of laughter and love but marked by period of sadness and depression which I can sympathise with. If you haven’t checked this out then definitely do as it adds so much to the man most of us only saw through a screen.
Buy it here:
Paperback/Hardcover: amazon.co.uk amazon.com
Kindle Edition: amazon.co.uk amazon.com
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